Just Arrested / Pre-Trial / Before Sentencing......

Just Arrested / Pre-Trial / Before Sentencing......

Just arrested, preparing for trial, preparing for sentencing.....scary place to be; you're not alone!
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In this stage of the process there are so many new feelings going on. We're scared, learning to be alone, learning the judicial system, terrified as to what the future holds for us and our significant others.

This is a safe environment to share our feelings, gain support and encouragement and share our gained knowledge. There is strength in numbers, together we can help each other.

Check out the forums for Public Education topics.

The views expressed herein are those of the group and do not necessarily reflect those of Strong Prison Wives and Families. Strong Prison Wives and Families, including all founders, staff, volunteers and members are not responsible for the views discussed herein. The views discussed herein are those of support and encouragement and under no circumstances can be viewed as legal suggestions. Strong Prison Wives and Families is a support network community of friends and family members of the incarcerated, the writers and readers suggestions are not to be confused for legal advise. Strong Prison Wives and Families also insists that particulars about pending are not discussed in detail as anything discussed herein could be used in a court of law.

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  • CG
    by CG 1 month ago
    So today my husband had what is likely his last extradition hearing. Today he chose to stop fighting (wisely, I might add). His "control date" is 1/22...he could leave by then but if not we go to court. Again. His PD thinks he'll be gone by the middle of next week. US Marshals are apparently quite eager to get him. And because there is no way for either of us to know when he's going until it happens, I find myself nearly as anxious and fearful as I was back in August when all of this began. I don't know how many of you ladies here have experienced this but I feel so frightened and depressed. I feel like I don't know what to do with myself until he's in Florida. Any encouragement/advice would be greatly appreciated.
  • CG
    by CG 1 month ago
    Hello! My name is CG and I'm brand new here. In August of this past year, my husband was arrested. Felony/fugitive from another state. And that's the least of it. I had no idea about this "bad boy" past of my husband's until a federal agent and half a dozen local detectives showed up with a search warrant. Needless to say, that was a fun day. It's been Hell ever since. He's been fighting the extradition ever since, to "support" me while I try to sell our house, pay our bills, and hire a lawyer. We haven't even begun fighting or doing anything yet. This limbo phase is making me crazy. I'm sure many of you have stories like mine (or worse) but one of my main questions is this: when your husband has lied to you for your entire marriage and the truth is dropped on you like this, how do you cope? How do you learn to forgive? I know that one day I will but sometimes the anger and sense of betrayal get the best of me and we have bad calls/visits. Our children are seven and nine- too young to understand. I want to forgive and let it go (for lack of a better term) but I don't know how. And it's hard. Then there's getting to Florida and seeing what happens. I know he is innocent of the charge in that state (though not for other things) but one thing he's learned from inmates who have been in similar positions (where a state and the feds can pursue charges) is that if you take a plea and sentence in the state where you're charged with a crime, the feds are usually more likely to leave you alone. Or so we hear. Has anyone been there? Any advice? On any end of this?
  • Cheryl
    by Cheryl 2 months ago
    So I'm new to this website. I'm looking for guidance, support, and encouragement. My boyfriend was arrested in Mid March by the state and when the state was going to be forced to give him only 5-8 years the federal government picked him up saying they could give him more time. His charges are very serious and could hold up to a life sentence just on one of the charges. He just got indicted a few days ago and the government is not budging on giving a plea bargain. He is only 25 years old and could potentially lose his life to the system. I'm so confused how the judicial system works. I've done more work than his paid attorney and we both just feel his attorney isn't fighting to win. He just wants my boyfriend to cooperate. with no guarantees. We've already paid close to $30,000 in legal fees and it's only just begun. I just don't understand how the federal government can just come in and sweep a case from the state, where the state didn't have enough evidence to charge him and with a life sentence. Just doesn't make sense to me. How can we go to trial not having faith in our attorney. The governments conviction rate is almost 100% so it's intimidating. What ever happen innocent until proven guilty. They are framing him for something he was no where near at the time. Plus he's a minority in an all white state, and he's an out of stater they are claiming. But his residential address has been in this state for the past 5 years. They've already said they are setting an example and basically using him as the poster child of all of this. The judges and prosecutors on the case have been all over the news saying racial slurs and all. It;s just mind boggling.
  • Josephine
    by Josephine 3 months ago
    Today is the 68th day my bf has been in county jail. He doesn’t have any prior felonies, just one misdemeanor, but his charges are pretty serious. His PD has not done much to help him, so I started doing my own research and found out a few things that we could try in order to get them to fight for him a little. At least the time spent learning and researching has given me something to do while we continue to wait. The not knowing is the hardest part for me. I read an article where a woman was dealing with a PD who was not interested in helping the person they were assigned to defend. The defendant decided to write the PD a letter asking her to consider for a moment that it were her own family member needing her services. She asked her to please fight for her and to try to remember that she was working for her, not the county that pays her salary. She listed her requests one by one, then in closing, asked the PD to respond to her requests in writing, so she knew that she was being heard, paid attention to, and by putting it all in writing, requesting a response, she at the very least, had documentation of her requests. I thought that was very smart so I urged my bf to write his own heartfelt letter to his PD. She read the letter at their last meeting, and so far, has kept in better contact with both my bf and myself. He goes back to court Friday so maybe she will actually argue on his behalf this time. I think it made her take a little more notice of him than her average defendant anyway. I don’t know. This is all so new and scary and I feel so helpless! I figure it can’t hurt to educate myself about the process and maybe, i might be able to help in some small way. I wish everyone here peace and hope and faith. Godspeed sisters!
  • Funsize
    by Funsize 6 months ago
    I'm wondering if anyone has had to get anything notorized from their SO while they're in. His ex-wife works where he is. He is expecting a refund check that is going to be mailed to her address. He has already stated that she knows how to sign his name. I'm worried he won't even know about her receiving it much less him being to access money. If anyone has some clue, please let me know. Thank you! In advance.
  • sweetheartjenna
    by sweetheartjenna 6 months ago
    sweetheartjenna
    by sweetheartjenna 1 day ago
    I haven't been very active sense April when my Boyfriend turned Feoncee had gotten out on bond. His case has not been going super well as he has a public pretender who is a POS. We're working on a change of counsel, and realize we have a long road ahead of us. and his case can potentially continue up until February if this happens. as of current everything is in the air, and feel like we know no more about whats going on then when this case first started. It is a frustrating and agonising experience, as of current we have wills and POA's drawn up but not signed. even being in the preparation for the worst case he does not want to sign the documents until he knows what he is in for bond that I guess it is making memories while we still can. One of the questions that has been running through my mind is if we should get married before incarceration or live with the possibility of having the worlds longest engagement. He does not want to get married and have our marriage associated with this event, at the same time we both agree that neither one of us want to get married in a "jail house wedding" I guess this is two fold. I can use prayers from all my understanding women and also advice on how to proceed with the engagement giving that I am sure some of you have been through this before.
  • Melissa
    by Melissa 7 months ago
    Hi, My name is Melissa and my fiance is sitting a local jail for driving on a suspended license.He has a very large record and they originally offered him 180 days but because I got a dr note that im pregnant and some other letters now there offereing him 90 days.He seems to think continuning to call the states attorney with character witness will cut his plea bargain.Do you agree?
  • Britty1007
    by Britty1007 7 months ago
    I am really going through it mentally. I don't know if I'm ready for October to get here or not. What could have been mere months is going to be years. An F5 refail with 5 years parole left. What the heck was he thinking? I know....he wasn't. I pray the judge sticks with the plea of 2 to 4 and doesn't give him a worse sentence. But then there's the fear of what the parole board is gonna do to him and he's already violated parole before. I mean, he says he never had a reason to change until he met me and I pray he's sincere about that. I will be devoted and faithful throughout all of this. But I will not allow myself to be put through it again once this is all done and over with. I love him, but this is his one screw up. I'm so scared of what's going to happen in October. Prayers and mercy for the morning of October 2nd. Oh, and I haven't heard his voice or seen his face since June 4th. What a nightmare.
  • Cupcake
    by Cupcake 7 months ago
    I'm scared. I'm so damn scared. It's day 61 since he got arrested for an OUI. (He was actually pulled over for an expired inspection sticker) I'm months behind on the rent, we had only been married 2 weeks when all this happened. He now says that the outcome could be worse than we anticipated. (2 1/2-5 years rather than the 6mos-1yr we were praying for)
    He's my soul. I waited almost 40 years to finally meet my other half, WHY? Just WHY?
  • Tmbz11
    by Tmbz11 7 months ago
    Dont even know where to start with my story. Bad situation just got worse when someone decided to try and get my husbamd in trouble and it worked. He was arrested yesterday. He was the "bread winner" I stay home with our twin toddlers. I dont know what i will do, how i will get by. No other support system for me and the kids. Scared out of my mind right now.