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  • Admin JoJo Matthews
    by Admin JoJo Matthews 20 days ago
    ricaJane I’m sorry to hear this. Hoping things work out.
  • RicaJane
    by RicaJane 20 days ago
    Hi - in MN. just joined this group and I am grateful for it. He just accepted the plea but I have no idea if they accepted it or not. And... I believe he is innocent and I am not willing to risk a lifetime to fight it, plus we don't have the resources.
    We were raided March 2017 and he hasn't been charged officially. however we have taken a plea of possibly 5 years - not yet confirmed.
  • Autumnsrains
    by Autumnsrains 1 month ago
    Hello - I just joined this group and I'm glad I found it. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one with feelings of stress, overwhelmed, sadness, anger etc. I really feel the justice system is so a** backwards. I live in VA and my husband has been locked up for a few months. They won't even let him out on bail. It's really become personal in my opinion. He has a trial in Sept and the prosecutor added charges. They are adding anything they think will stick. I feel sick about the whole thing. AND we have two young kids who are the ones being punished by the prosecutors. I don't know anything anymore. I'm really glad I found this support site because unless you are going through it nobody can possibly understand what its like.
  • Miss Louise
    by Miss Louise 2 months ago
    I am from Sydney, Australia and brand new to this site. Upon extensive research and endless google searches for a support network for spouses of inmates I have found there is nothing at all available to us here in Australia. I am aware the feelings shared will be similar all over the world but obviously our legal system and the whole process of visits/phone calls etc is very different. I know there must be plenty of other Aussies feeling isolated and overwhelmed, I would love to chat with you if you stumble across this! Strength and love to all
  • CG
    by CG 5 months ago
    So today my husband had what is likely his last extradition hearing. Today he chose to stop fighting (wisely, I might add). His "control date" is 1/22...he could leave by then but if not we go to court. Again. His PD thinks he'll be gone by the middle of next week. US Marshals are apparently quite eager to get him. And because there is no way for either of us to know when he's going until it happens, I find myself nearly as anxious and fearful as I was back in August when all of this began. I don't know how many of you ladies here have experienced this but I feel so frightened and depressed. I feel like I don't know what to do with myself until he's in Florida. Any encouragement/advice would be greatly appreciated.
  • CG
    by CG 5 months ago
    Hello! My name is CG and I'm brand new here. In August of this past year, my husband was arrested. Felony/fugitive from another state. And that's the least of it. I had no idea about this "bad boy" past of my husband's until a federal agent and half a dozen local detectives showed up with a search warrant. Needless to say, that was a fun day. It's been Hell ever since. He's been fighting the extradition ever since, to "support" me while I try to sell our house, pay our bills, and hire a lawyer. We haven't even begun fighting or doing anything yet. This limbo phase is making me crazy. I'm sure many of you have stories like mine (or worse) but one of my main questions is this: when your husband has lied to you for your entire marriage and the truth is dropped on you like this, how do you cope? How do you learn to forgive? I know that one day I will but sometimes the anger and sense of betrayal get the best of me and we have bad calls/visits. Our children are seven and nine- too young to understand. I want to forgive and let it go (for lack of a better term) but I don't know how. And it's hard. Then there's getting to Florida and seeing what happens. I know he is innocent of the charge in that state (though not for other things) but one thing he's learned from inmates who have been in similar positions (where a state and the feds can pursue charges) is that if you take a plea and sentence in the state where you're charged with a crime, the feds are usually more likely to leave you alone. Or so we hear. Has anyone been there? Any advice? On any end of this?
  • Cheryl
    by Cheryl 6 months ago
    So I'm new to this website. I'm looking for guidance, support, and encouragement. My boyfriend was arrested in Mid March by the state and when the state was going to be forced to give him only 5-8 years the federal government picked him up saying they could give him more time. His charges are very serious and could hold up to a life sentence just on one of the charges. He just got indicted a few days ago and the government is not budging on giving a plea bargain. He is only 25 years old and could potentially lose his life to the system. I'm so confused how the judicial system works. I've done more work than his paid attorney and we both just feel his attorney isn't fighting to win. He just wants my boyfriend to cooperate. with no guarantees. We've already paid close to $30,000 in legal fees and it's only just begun. I just don't understand how the federal government can just come in and sweep a case from the state, where the state didn't have enough evidence to charge him and with a life sentence. Just doesn't make sense to me. How can we go to trial not having faith in our attorney. The governments conviction rate is almost 100% so it's intimidating. What ever happen innocent until proven guilty. They are framing him for something he was no where near at the time. Plus he's a minority in an all white state, and he's an out of stater they are claiming. But his residential address has been in this state for the past 5 years. They've already said they are setting an example and basically using him as the poster child of all of this. The judges and prosecutors on the case have been all over the news saying racial slurs and all. It;s just mind boggling.
  • Josephine
    by Josephine 7 months ago
    Today is the 68th day my bf has been in county jail. He doesn’t have any prior felonies, just one misdemeanor, but his charges are pretty serious. His PD has not done much to help him, so I started doing my own research and found out a few things that we could try in order to get them to fight for him a little. At least the time spent learning and researching has given me something to do while we continue to wait. The not knowing is the hardest part for me. I read an article where a woman was dealing with a PD who was not interested in helping the person they were assigned to defend. The defendant decided to write the PD a letter asking her to consider for a moment that it were her own family member needing her services. She asked her to please fight for her and to try to remember that she was working for her, not the county that pays her salary. She listed her requests one by one, then in closing, asked the PD to respond to her requests in writing, so she knew that she was being heard, paid attention to, and by putting it all in writing, requesting a response, she at the very least, had documentation of her requests. I thought that was very smart so I urged my bf to write his own heartfelt letter to his PD. She read the letter at their last meeting, and so far, has kept in better contact with both my bf and myself. He goes back to court Friday so maybe she will actually argue on his behalf this time. I think it made her take a little more notice of him than her average defendant anyway. I don’t know. This is all so new and scary and I feel so helpless! I figure it can’t hurt to educate myself about the process and maybe, i might be able to help in some small way. I wish everyone here peace and hope and faith. Godspeed sisters!
  • Funsize
    by Funsize 10 months ago
    I'm wondering if anyone has had to get anything notorized from their SO while they're in. His ex-wife works where he is. He is expecting a refund check that is going to be mailed to her address. He has already stated that she knows how to sign his name. I'm worried he won't even know about her receiving it much less him being to access money. If anyone has some clue, please let me know. Thank you! In advance.
  • sweetheartjenna
    by sweetheartjenna 10 months ago
    sweetheartjenna
    by sweetheartjenna 1 day ago
    I haven't been very active sense April when my Boyfriend turned Feoncee had gotten out on bond. His case has not been going super well as he has a public pretender who is a POS. We're working on a change of counsel, and realize we have a long road ahead of us. and his case can potentially continue up until February if this happens. as of current everything is in the air, and feel like we know no more about whats going on then when this case first started. It is a frustrating and agonising experience, as of current we have wills and POA's drawn up but not signed. even being in the preparation for the worst case he does not want to sign the documents until he knows what he is in for bond that I guess it is making memories while we still can. One of the questions that has been running through my mind is if we should get married before incarceration or live with the possibility of having the worlds longest engagement. He does not want to get married and have our marriage associated with this event, at the same time we both agree that neither one of us want to get married in a "jail house wedding" I guess this is two fold. I can use prayers from all my understanding women and also advice on how to proceed with the engagement giving that I am sure some of you have been through this before.